Top Reasons to get the iPhone 6 Plus

iphone 4s aka iphone 5As a professional tech writer and original blogger, when I first saw that the iPhone 6 was getting a dose of Viagra, I could not have been more jolly. Most people don’t know what is so great about this. I figured instead of talking and writing about it, I’d just hammer out the top, top top reasons – so you get get in line RIGHT NOW.

  1. Chicks. Love. Bigger. You will get laid if you flash this device around. Instantly.
  2. Porn! Big screen! YESS.
  3. Think how much that mongo thing vibrates – your wife will love it.
  4. SLOW MO CAMERA  – film those things you always wanted to, in SLOMO
  5. It is weaponized.
  6. Stops more bullets than a normal iPhone 6.
  7. Can serve as dinner plate.
  8. Double those “happy to see me?” comments
  9. Excuse to wear big baggy pants like a THUG
  10. Holster.
  11. PORn
  12. Packs huge speakers – its a new age boom box, bitch.
  13. Longer chassis makes for easier upskirt shooting.
  14. TOP NOTCH sexting with that sick forward facing camera. Full frontal sexting anyone???

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