[Office Living] How to Sneak Out of Work Early

Some of us leave work early more often than others. Sometimes to eat at Fuddruckers. For those of you who do leave work early and often, the majority of you are known as the awesomes of the office. However, with the right mix of creativity and operational excellence, you can become an early exit-er without consequence.

The following tips will have you moving up the corporate ladder from the seat of your couch in no time:

Do not wear a jacket. If a jacket is absolutely necessary, try to hang your jacket in the main lobby area our outside of busy areas where people will see you wearing a jacket. Wearing a jacket wreaks (smells) of “I’m heading out for the day”. The absence of a jacket relieves some of the anxiety involved in leaving work early.

Keep your computer logged on and if your workplace has an instant messenger device, ALWAYS stay logged on. We’re fully aware of the fact that most corporations require you to log off at the end of each day, or at the very least, lock your computer. Locking your computer automatically triggers your status to “Away” on most versions of corporate instant messaging software. This is an absolute no-no. By keeping your computer on and remaining logged on, not only do you have the ability to leave whenever you want, but you can also arrive whenever you want.

If possible, time delay meaningless e-mails. Microsoft Outlook provides a time delay option that allows you to write and send a message long before it is actually sent. Best practice is to delay these emails by 2 hours. If you plan on leaving work at 3pm, be sure to time delay the email for 5:13. The random time provides further proof that you were in the office past 5pm and lessens any chance of a manager detecting the time delay. As for the content of the email, it is always safe to ask questions in which you already know the answer.

Always search for alternate escape routes. Most buildings have multiple exit paths. Side doors, back doors, and fire exit staircases are your best friend. Make sure to mix it up and NEVER, EVER use the elevators.

Always leave your jacket hanging on your chair. If someone is looking for you, they’ll think you’re at a meeting or in the bathroom. More often than not, the visitor doesn’t return because they rarely have something important to say.

Always schedule doctor or dental appointments in the early afternoon, but not too early. Tell your manager you’ll make up the hours in the morning. Always be aware of your manager’s typical arrival time. For example, if your manager always arrives at 8 a.m. and you’ve got a dental appointment at 3 p.m., tell your manager you’ll come into work a couple hours early. Rather than showing up at 6 a.m. show up at 7:55 a.m. The previous day, utilize item #6 and time delay an e-mail to be sent at 6:06 a.m.

One Reply to “[Office Living] How to Sneak Out of Work Early”

  1. i have a tiny smoke machine hidden in a mug so it looks like hot java all the time! HAHAHA LOL

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