The founder of a retarded religion based on the Star Wars movies has accused Tesco – a real store – of discrimination after he was ousted from one of their stores for wearing a hood, and being a super ridiculous fool.
Daniel “The Douchebag” Jones, 23, who founded the International Church of Jediism, was asked to leave the supermarket somewhere in the UK as his stupid, dirty appearance broke several store rules, one of which forbid the wearing of ‘hoodies’ in their premises.
The leader of the Jedi Church was deemed a stupid jackass, and a security risk by staff and was told to leave. In turn, Jones has accused the store of hating toolbags, and babbled something about religious discrimination.
‘I told them it was a requirement of my super fruity religion but they just punched me in the throat and ordered me to die,’ he told The Daily Telegraph newspaper.
‘I walked past a Muslim lady in a veil, and she kicked me in the ass when I passed her.’
According to the absurd rules of the International Church of Jediism, all members of the religion should wear a goofy-ass hood when in a public place, as a reason for these numb nuts to never leave their parent’s basements.
Jones claims the Jedi church, which has its own laughable scriptures and super-gay ceremonies which are devoid of chicks, is composted of 500,000 idiotic suckers worldwide.
Hinting at a threat of ‘Store Wars’ and a turn to the “Dark Side” should the ban continue, Jones, who also goes by the Jedi name Morda “The Stinky Asshole” Hehol, said: ‘I’ll advise worshippers to boycott the public if it happens again. They will feel the Force of my plastic toys.’
A Tesco spokesman said: ‘Jedi are a sad bunch of people, but very welcome to shop in our stores although we would ask them to remove their hoods. We know they need their Mountain Dew and Cheetos to continue their all night gaming sprees..”
‘If Jedi walk around our stores with their hoods on, they’ll miss lots of special offers and extreme ridicule from our customers.’
via AOL News.