A BBQ Conundrum

gristle beard
Gosh,  the humanity. Yesterday, to celebrate the Inaugauration in style, we brought in tons of smoked meats and slathered ribs and luscious side dishes for PAO staff to enjoy while they hooted and hollered. Problem is, that BBQ was so damn good that I thought about it all night. Even while contemplating my day before drifting off to dreamland with the stereo on eleven, I was still salivating about that barbecue. I am pretty sure I ejaculated barbecue sauce in the middle of the night. It is now 9AM. There are tons of leftovers in the staff kitchen. I want to be in there, elbow deep in a holy spicy tangy ambrosia. While everyone is making their coffee, I will be pulling gristle out of my beard… yum…


Ok kids. It is about time we had a custom membership enrollment page. By the powers vested in me by my cattle stock options, I am empowering a committee of powerful males to decide what it should look like, and then to get that sucker done. Committee, prepare a feasibility analysis and estimate a project plan all you want, but it should take no more than 4 man hours, including project management. It should use LDAP. PHP code is beneath me, so I cannot be asked to implement jack shit. Bobcat Goldthwait will be your treasurer.

#199 – Count down to 2Hundo-eth Post

You Win
You Win
As we continue our count down to 200 posts, we count down each post thats posted. This post being #199. Wow. A year ago, Pineappleope.com staff thought this goal was inconceivable. Wrong

To Celebrate #199, Today, Pineappleope.com and Associates will more likely than not celebrate. More likely than not Pineappleope.com will reach 200 posts today.

In other news highlights, Pineappleope.com has just passed 420 comments today. Currently the stat is at 428 comments. You can consider that, along with Pineappleope.com’s consideration, that that is a major landmark.

Today will no doubt be remembered by all Pineappleope.com staff and its readers. more often than not.

Great Job Team



Once the bubbles stop fizzing in the New Year’s champagne glasses, we know it is time for the PAO annual meeting. This is probably one of the most boring things ever, but we are required to do it by local, state, and federal laws, as well as the corporate bylaws and to avoid dirty looks from the board of directors.
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The Pineappleope Spirit

Today our intrepid leader became a living symbol of the commitment PAO leadership has for brining pineappleopiness to readers everywhere. Despite gale-force sleepiness and deafening alarm clock tones, our Editor-at-large rose at the bloody crack in order to be here for an important SEO meeting. SEO, for those that don’t know, stands for Salad a la Endive with Oil, and promises to drive our brand of hard hitting crack pipes and unvarnished crack reporting to even more of you, the unwashed masses. His arrival time was probably close to 9am, which is at least an hour earlier than anyone has ever been before.

New SEO work could renew talks of a Pineappleope.com partnership with the Brazilian UFO Research Network (BURN). BURN made headlines last month after failing a hostile takeover attempt of Pineappleope Industries Limited, the holding company for Pineappleope.com. Sources inside BURN have said the group is still open to a merger and/or acquisition.
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