Beach season can be very exciting. The problem: For the first few weeks, this excitement can be overwhelming – Because up until a few weeks ago, we were only able to see half naked woman from the screen of our PC’s (where it is acceptable to have a monster erection). It’s sort of like seeing a lion at the zoo vs seeing one out in the wild.
We know this transition can be difficult, so we’ve outlined a few tips for you this summer season.
Dig A Hole In The Sand – At the first signs of giant hard-on some of us tend to panic and roll over immediately. This can be painful if not executed properly. And depending on your shorts, there is a possibility of your little buddy getting a sneak peak of some sun light. Stay calm and dig a small hole where your pelvic region meets your towel. This will allow your yogurt slinger to safely and comfortably retract.
Pretend Like You’re Stretching – Stretching at the beach is commonly practiced, so you won’t have to worry about looking awkward. People will think you’re about to go for a jog or a power swim. Hiding a boner will be the last thing on anybodies mind.
Place Beer Between Legs – If you’re in a situation where you’re in a lawn chair, you may not want to lose your seat. Fear not, this is but a perfect opportunity to crack open another cold beer.
The beer can works in two ways.
- It can be used to cover an unwelcome bulge.
- The chilling beer can works as an electric fence when it comes into contact with your penis.
Conclusion: The first few weeks of beach season can be a true testament of one’s willpower and focus. When venturing away from your towel to retrieve more food and beverages, we’d suggest that you keep your line of site directly in front of you. If at anytime you become distracted, just think of this guy.
Check out the latest shots of Ashley Tisdale from our Hawaiian paohilton correspondent (who remains nameless for anonymity)!
What more could you want? Ashley Tisdale in a skimpy bikini – all for you! See the BIG gallery .. Read the rest of this entry »
Olivia Munn. The ultimate nerd’s wet dream. Possibly created in a lab, some say – she’s half Chinese and half Babe. She’s got smarts. She’s got the ability to down a large hot dog in one gulp. She wears bikini’s and takes them off at the beach. She makes out with other hot chicks (who doesn’t like lesbian action!). She even did some Playboy action, so you know she’s LEGIT.
Oh, and she’s on G4, the nerd station – where she actually can talk about nerd things. She knows nerds. Nerds know her. Nerds want her. Well – PAO has her! Images of her at least – here ya go, nerds! Hit the BREAK for some serious babe action, from bikini to lesbian to sausage swallowing. This girl does it ALL.
December (Dee-sem-behr) is the twelfth and last month of the year in the Gregorian Calendar and one of seven Gregorian months with the length of 31 days.
Did you know? In Latin, decem means “ten”. December was also the tenth month in the Roman calendar until a monthless winter period was divided between January and February.
Theres More!!!! —>>> Read the rest of this entry »
Oh wait, that’s not our beach. Too much Thong per Dong.
Mile Cyrus hot bikini pics – fat or skinny? Just shut up!? [gallery] [bikini pics] #mileythursday #hannahmontana
Don’t call Miley Cyrus fat or skinny. Just shut up! Or, look at the bikini pictures and decide for yourself.
Miley Cyrus complained about her 16-year-old body on Twitter this weekend.
“i just jiggled my thighs and they shook on their own for 3 mississipis no more late night lucky charms,” she posted.
But she’s dealing pretty well for a teenage girl.
“Talk all you want. i have my flaws. im a normal girl theres things about my body i would change but stop with calling me f*t in post. i dont…even like the word,” She wrote. “those remarks that you hateful people use are fighting words.”
She went on: “oh and ps if your thighs don’t jiggle go see a doctor. thanks. ” Later, she posted, “Wow. Now I’m upsetting people cause im putting down skinny girls.”
“@NicoleRichie has one of the tinniest, most adorable bodies, and I guarantee even HER thighs jiggle. Everyones do!!!” Cyrus tweeted. “im not putting skinny girls down! i believe in exercise and treating your body like a temple ”
PAOParazzi has captured the following gallery of Miley at the beach. She’s wearing a bikini – which most people do at the beach. Should she, though? YOU be the judge!!
Recently, Vanessa Minnillo was caught with nothing on, but a bikini. For you all who are just meeting Vanessa for the first time, here is a little background: She is an American television personality, television host, model, actress, former Miss Teen USA, and she is mostly known for hosting Total Request Live on MTV (AKA TRL).
Minnillo was in a sporadic three-year relationship with New York Yankees dbag shortstop Derek Jeter from November 2003-2006. She is currently dating Nick Lachey after meeting and shooting in Lachey’s music video.
You can find more pics Vanessa Wearing close to nothing and nothing after the break
Read the rest of this entry »