Archive for the ‘Great Job Team’ Category

[the best things] Working late on a Saturday. Whats the best thing?

Sometimes, working for a high profile, high powered company like Pineappleope forces you to test limits. It forces you to do whatever it takes to get things done. Today was a day like that. Drink all afternoon and then log into work at midnight. The team is counting on you. What do you do???

1. Concoct a beverage to keep things interesting. Guinness and iced coffee. DONE.

2. Get your stuff done. DONE.

3. Wait on inferior teammates to do their shit. Not done.

4. In case of 3 failing, like it is right now, analyze PAO stats.  PAO stats are a never ending source of knowledge and power.

5. In case of 4, share with the world some of this new power that feeds your brains. SO, what do creatures of the night need from PAO? Here’s a rare glimpse into the private data of PAO datacenters..

Claymation porn

extreme bikini

Maria+Kanellis+playboy

vanessa hudgens nude

olympic nipple slips

looking+at+a+boner

ashley+tisdale+no+clothes

carrie prejean video

jessica+biel

So there ya have it.. no one wants anything but some hot action tonight. Way to go, team. Way.. to.. go.

 

[Discoveries] PAO Discovers Undiscovered Bearded Monkey: AKA Ginger Monk

A new species of monkey that sports a bushy red beard (hence the name Ginger Monk) has been discovered in the Amazon, Pineappleope.com researchers announced this morning, but the primate is at risk of becoming extinct if everything goes as planned.

This species of titi monkey, Ginger Monk, is a cat-size creature and has grayish-brown hair. Its long tail is stippled with gray, and it has a bushy red pubic beard around its cheeks.

Unlike other monkeys closely related to it, Ginger Monk does not have a white bar on its forehead, environmental group Pineappleope International said Thursday. The finding was also published in the journal Primate Conservation.

“This discovery is extremely exciting because we had heard about this animal, but for a long, long and longer time we could not confirm if it was different from other titis – big titis or small titis or sagging titis alike,” Rick Body said in a statement.

Unlike most primates, these titi monkeys form lifelong relationships. Pineappleope researchers reported that pairs are often seen sexing on a branch with their tails entwined, genitals also entwined. They usually have one baby per year.

Great Job Team

 

[RE-Opened] The FBI has RE-Opened PAO

PAO will not be closing. The FBI has rescinded on the closing of PAO

Great Job Team

 
 

[Beach Time] PAO Annual Beach Day Photos!

Check out last year’s Annual Beach Day party from PAO, Inc! From fantastic fireworks every week, 19 in all, to 80 free summer concerts, PAO Annual Beach Day has something for everyone. Come marvel at the Masters of Adult Sand Sculpting in June, find out who will be Miss PAO 2010 in July, show off your talent at the annual PAO Beach Day Talent competition, or feel like a kid again in August on Catholic Clergy Day, and see the season end with our famous 3-Day Old Seafood Eating Contest in September. But please, don’t sit around waiting for these and other special events!

Because everyone knows that the annual PAO Beach Day is a great day at the beach and a whole lot more! Check out the action!!

 

[Holiday] Independence Day 2010 – July 4th

Independence day falls on July 4th this year, for most Americans and Jessica Simpson, it is this coming Sunday.

For only US citizens this is a Federal holiday commemorating the adoption of the Declaration of Independence on July 4, 1776, declaring independence from the Kingdom of Great Britain. While US citizens don’t have to work on the 4th, you will still see illegal migrants manning hot dog stands and crushing lemons for fresh lemonade.


A few observations:

- July 4 is the 185th day of the year

- On July 4th there will be 180 days remaining until the end of the year.

- The Aphelion, the point in the year when the Earth is farthest from the Sun, occurs around this date.

- The terms 4th of July or Fourth of July usually refer to Independence Day in the United States

- Fireworks are nothing short of mind blowing

Great Job Team

 

[Inspiration] GO TEAM! PAO loves teamwork.

PAO would like to congratulate itself, for being one of the top web properties ever. Happy July!

 

[Modern HR Techniques] Derrick been a bad boy

PAO staffers occasionally disagree about important issues. When these situations arise, we usually just execute one of the dissenters. This sends a stern message to the rest of the staff to get along. But when the issue is trivial, we don’t advocate fatal punishments, we encourage the workers to resolve their differences using pranks and fisticuffs. One example is to lure another employee into a discussion about LDAP or Twatter or your boring fishing blog. This is a pretty extreme punishment, so in general lets try simpler, more corporal punishments. Below, you can see this strategy in action, captured on one of the many surveillance cameras we have setup throughout PAO world headquarters.

 
 

[live blogging] Waiting for FedEx Truck

Pineappleope is recieving undisclosed package from FedEx delivery man. PAO is on hand to live blog this event

10:18 – The wait is on…

10:30 – Drinking a coffee, brewed by my own two hands. No FedEx truck in sight

10:39 – Just about half way through my coffee

10:52 – No sign of FedEx, growing increasingly pissed

10:57 – Grabbed binoculars for better view

11:01 – I spotted squirrels… no f’in truck yet – growing more impatient

11:06 – This apple liveblogging cell phone is on it’s last legs after 1 hr of strenuous and cutting edge 3g use, looking for charger

11:10 – Package arrived, Yes

11:20 – UNBOXING

11:38 – Almost unboxed

….KEEP READING THE LIVE BLOG Read the rest of this entry »

 

[Shop] Pineappleope.com Introduces: Online Shopping!!

Get the Official Pineappleope.com goods at the PAO SHOP!

Everything you ever want:

- clothes !!!!

- barrels !!!!!

- food !!!!!

- gloves !!!!!

- entertainment machines !!!

- intimate gifts !!!!

- weight training !!!!

- ammo !!!

- tools !!!

- good reads !!!!

BUY it all NOW at the PAO SHOP

Start Shopping from :


- Your Bed room !!

- Laos !!

- Your Car !!

- Granny’s house !!

- A sporting event !!

- A jet !!

- Your school dance !!

- Work !!

SHOP SHOP SHOP at the PAO SHOP

Read the rest of this entry »

 

[Acquisitions] Pineappleope.com Bidding on Sex.com

Reporters are reporting that Pineappleope.com has plans to bid on the second most valuable Internet domain: SEX.COM. This ultimate domain is headed to auction next week after the previous owner defaulted on its debts.

Escom LLC paid a reported $14 million for the Web site in 2006. But the company failed to repay debt owed to DOM Partners LLC, the New Jersey-based lender that helped finance the deal.

As a result, sex.com will be sold “as is” in the equivalent of a foreclosure sale, according to a letter from DOM Partners’ lawyers that was made public Tuesday. The auction is set for March 18 in New York, and bidders are required to appear with a certified check for $1 million to participate.

Pineappleope.com will be in New York with a certified check for $6 million under the assumption this SEX.COM bidding war will not go above $5.9 million. If the auction is won, Pineappleope.com promises to create an extremely racy and explicit web portal.

PAO will keep you informed how the auction goes down… with possible live-blogging.

Great Job Team

 
 

[UPDATE] PAO Scheduled Downtime is Over

PAO IS BACK UP!

Thank you for your patience during our scheduled downtime

great job team

Downtime Pics >>> Read the rest of this entry »

 

[WARNING] Scheduled PAO Downtime 12:00pm – 12:05pm Thursday 3/4

PAO is conducting several tests

Expect PAO Downtime from 12:00pm – 12:05pm Today, Thursday 3/4

Great Job Team

 

[BLizZard '10] PAO SNOW DAY

PAO action will be significantly reduced due to the impending Blizzard of 2010. PAO staff are hitting the slopes in search of the elusive brazilian snow bunny

Great Job Team

Continue to our Tasteful Snow Bunny Gallery >>> Read the rest of this entry »

 

[Great Job Team] Pineappleope.com Expands to 1500 – Throws Math Party

Year 1500 was a leap year starting on Wednesday of the Julian calendar. Pineappleope.com’s 1500th article was published on a Tuesday.

The Take Away:
- Heavy Heavy Traffic
- Celebrity Readers
- A-List Celebrity Guest Writers
- Average time on site: longer than expected

Great Job Team

Continue to The PAO 1500 Math Party >>> Read the rest of this entry »

 
 

[Watermarks] PAO Adds New Watermarks

Testing new cutting edge Watermarks functions. Branding this ass

Great Job Team

More Testing >>> Read the rest of this entry »